an affirmation
My Crohns has come back and i was thoroughly pissed off about it, at the time I was developing some video workshops for kids around the idea of self esteem. Part of the process was that they should write something about themselves with only 2 rules it begins with ' myname is...' and ends with 'and I'm all right'
as part of the process I wrote one for myself and i would encourage other people to do the same it's actually quite liberating to share this sort of stuff and to know you're not on your own with it.. anyway here's mine
My name is Paul Fellowes and for the past 27 years I have suffered from Crohn's disease, in that time I have visited 14 hospitals in two hemispheres seen around 50 qualified doctors,and around 30 med students who all lined up to hear my stomach splash, I've had 32 endoscopys, 14 colonoscopys, 7 barium x-rays, 2 barium enemas and a sigmoidoscopy, I've 2 major operations taken methasalazyne, sulphasalazyne, imuran, zantac and a host of others I can't even begin to remember, I've had the moments every crohn's sufferer dreads driving up the freeway with 15k to the services sometimes just made it, sometimes just didn't.
I've suffered indescribable pain, terrible embarassment, created gases that could be used in chemical warfare, been unable to keep any food down for days on end and very very nearly slipped off this mortal coil
I've been married, divorced, engaged twice, married again I've fathered 3 wonderful children, climbed mountains and jumped off them, I've played football with a socceroo, boxed a state MP made films and music videos that people have actually watched and enjoyed, I've trained young girls in technical theatre skills(and common sense), I've helped young people get back on the right side of the law, raised thousands of dollars for charity and most importantly fallen in love and stayed there
Am I upset that my crohn's is back ....definately
Do I hate my Crohn's?
No because it's part of me and I'm allright